Que Sera Sera

Another gem I came across during my time at Rinehart's that took a common phrase and gave it something special, courtesy of Sly and the Family Stone.  It came into my life during a resigned Melancholy rut revolving around a dream come true that freaked me out, about a longshot that would fall short in the romantic department. She wasn't the one that got away, she was never there to begin with, but this young woman intrigued and inspired me, whether I was romantically interested in her or not. I just LIKED her as a person, in they way you wish someone was your twin, you just like being around them, what they have to offer.  I'm not sure I ever liked someone so much.  I have definitely loved more, but I really enjoyed her presence in my world.  I felt like there was someone out there who got it, who eased the burden of being upright I felt hampered by when my spirits were down, my sails without a whisper of lift.

The previous year, when I was in the throws of the international incident I made the acquaintance of another "cool" young woman.  She seemed to have her head on straight, her heart in the right place, and it was so easy to get along with her, just relate.  This was the kind of woman you crossed the world to pursue if she had an interest in you. Getting to know her made the affair I was engaged in seem all the more a mockery of  what I tried to convince myself it could be to justify the indiscretion and sin.

Neither of these young women were in my life very long, but for the moments they were friends with me, and shared a bit of their perspective and spark, I was a happy dude. Such are the luxuries of youthful ambivalence and unsettled lives.  It was a valuable lesson though, in not viewing people for how much you can get from them, but for what they are kind enough to share.  They don't have to be anything more than sweet people to know, and that's good enough for me. It also helps if they don't have any needs they want you to meet, or unmet needs they want to complain about either.  For me, Emma and Anna were people who primed me for being Ok with myself, by myself, and recognizing that as easily as friends may materialize, they may also vanish.

Of course not everyone you'll come to know will be a joy or "cool", and in those cases, Que Sera Sera is less comforting.  It might be resignation masking discontent.  In that case, invoke the serenity prayer, and exercise your freedom to vanish if need be. It's ok, there are 6 billion people on Earth, being alone is a choice.